In sake of fairness, I must say that I do come across establishments that provide extremely good service. However, those seem to be the exception rather than the rule. In order to encourage more good service, when I am fortunate enough to find it, I thank the provider and tell them how much I appreciate it. Occasionally, I will even seek out the manager of the establishment to tell him what a great job his employee did for me and to ask him or her to keep up the good work. A pat on the back goes a long way!

The main reason that individuals provide bad service comes down to a simple bad attitude. The person who doesn’t care enough to provide good service generally has the attitude that what they are doing doesn’t matter, that the establishment  does not matter, that their customer’s do not matter, that the thing they are selling does not matter or in the worst cases, that nothing in life matters.

The owners and operators of establishments that provide bad service are at fault too. They often seem oblivious to the bad service their employees provide or the fact that they are losing hundreds or even thousands of dollars every week because customers hate dealing with them!

Various surveys and studies over the past decade indicate that 60% to 70% of all lost business is a result of the attitude of customer service personnel or sales people. The lost business accounts for hundreds of millions of dollars in lost business every year world-wide. Despite these alarming losses, businesses continue to tolerate employees with bad attitudes and will often defend the attitude of their miserable or thoughtless employees as being “unusual” or even by simply denying it.

I think that business leaders all over the world would agree that they want their business to be considered a good place to do business. With that in mind, here are some things you might consider doing to improve the “attitude” of your employees and recover some of those lost “bad-service dollars”:

1. When you observe a bad customer service attitude deal with it immediately. Wait until the customer is gone and then confront the employee, letting them know where they went wrong and how to improve. If the attitude or behaviour goes unchecked it will be hard to change later.
2. Put on seminars and workshops to explain to your employees what good customer service should look like.  Tell them and what you expect from them when they interact with customers and what is not acceptable. Give them a “customer service roadmap” to follow.
3. Some of the best establishments have actual, written customer service manuals. These can help even the most “block-headed” employees understand the difference between good and bad customer service and the value of it. Write it down so that they can read it and retain it in their minds.
4. “Inspect what you expect”. It is not good enough to simply tell your people to provide good service. Monitor your establishment’s customer service by getting out of your office and watching your employees as they interact with customers. Just your presence on the floor should improve service…If not, you might need to work on your leadership skills.
5. Ask random people you meet. Ask other business people, folks you meet at parties, or people you meet in the grocery store, if they have been to your establishment and if so, how they felt about the service. You might be surprised what you hear.
6. Send out customer service surveys. Send out surveys to as many customers as possible in order to get a fair sampling. Some people complain about everything when asked but if your get the same complaint over and over again, you can be quite certain that you have a problem.
7. Put a customer satisfaction application on your website. Allow customers to rate their satisfaction with your service and provide a box for comments. We live in an online world and many people are more likely to comment if they can do it online.
8. Tell your employees what you have learned. When you have done your monitoring, inspections and surveys, have meetings with all employees to let them know what you heard, what their customers are saying about them, and what you would like to see in the future.
9. “Thank your superstar employees for providing great service.” Let everyone in your establishment know who that stars are and what they do that is different. A good service attitude can become contagious when it is openly praised or rewarded.
10. Get tough on bad service providers. This area of business leadership is often ignored or avoided due to the simple fear of confrontation. As tough as it may be to be critical of another human being you have to accept that the establishment leader is ultimately responsible for the success or failure of the business. You must deal directly and sometimes harshly with the bad attitudes of your employees. Don’t become the victim of someone else’s attitude!

Don’t let your business earn a reputation for bad service. Get involved with your employees to assure that their interactions provide the best possible buying experience for your customers. Make service the number one priority of your business and assure your longevity and success well into the future!   

Dynamic Leadership Inc. is a premier provider of personal development training in North America. Ask them to put on their “Attitude and Ethics” seminar for your employees as soon as possible.

www.dlionline.ca

Here is a brief and simplified recap of the basic DISC styles:

DOMINANT: This can be identified by forceful, confident, competitive behaviour.

INFLUENCING: This can be identified by cheerful, optimistic, trusting, outgoing behaviour.

STEADY: This can be identified by sociable, thoughtful, non-emotional behaviour.

COMPLIANT: This can be identified by organized, tidy, conscientious behaviour.

When communicating with a DOMINANT person you must accept that for them, winning is all- important.

When a dominant person begins to show signs of becoming adamant during a discussion, (as they often will) it is often best to simply allow them to carry on until they have finished making their point. If you try to interrupt them, or cut them short, you will only inflame their dominance and either start an argument or cause them to talk longer in order to reinforce their perspective. In some cases it is even best to concede to their point of view or at least agree that they have made a good point, until such time as you are able to approach the subject from a different tack. In all cases, you should attempt to appeal to their ego and their need for success. Letting them win one argument might allow you the opportunity to win one yourself at a later time. However, vehement or over-zealous disagreement while a dominant person is speaking will usually end in a negative result. Depending on how strongly they are influenced by the other elements of their DISC style, it might even harm or destroy your relationship completely. Although High “D’s” tend to try to control conversations and win every argument, just like other people most of them enjoy helping others to accomplish their goals. Being part of another person’s success is after all a type of winning and that will appeal to their natural ego-driven personas. If you allow them the opportunity to help you and then praise them for it, you might just make a friend for life.

When communicating with a highly INFLUENCING person you should expect them to talk a lot and attempt humour at every opportunity.

People with a strong influential style are highly expressive and they love people. They are perhaps, the easiest style to get along with. However, if you are a highly compliant person, you will soon tire of their lack of attention to detail, and if you are a highly steady person, you might be put off by the speed at which they make decisions. Dominant people will usually have no problem controlling them but highly Influential people are usually fine with that. If you want to appeal to a highly Influential person, laugh at their jokes and give them a pat on the back often. Highly Influential people have a need to be appreciated and they like flashy possessions that bring attention to themselves. Expect them to be the life of the party and depending upon how much influence the other elements of their DISC style have upon them, you might also expect them to be silly or politically incorrect from time to time. High “I’s” like to have fun so if you join in with their light hearted banter, you can easily become an immediate ally and fast friend.

When communicating with a high STEADY you must remember that they are addicted to security and tend to want a lot of information before making decisions.

High Steady’s want assurance that any decision they make is the right one before they act on it. They are committed to their families and they strive to provide safety and security for them. They prefer not to make a significant decision unless their family or trusted friends are aware of the details and buy into it. They generally want the world to slow down, so do not push them too hard to make a decision or force them to create speedy results. Give them time to go away and think about it before formulating a response. The expression, “slow and steady wins the race” was probably written by a high steady personality. High Steady’s tend to be private people and are not likely to want to tell you about their innermost fears or challenges until they believe the time is right so do not pry and do push them to speak before they are ready.  High “S’s” prefer not to show their emotions publicly, so do not expect them to become excited or happy when you tell them something that might be extremely impressive to other people. If they tell you calmly and emotionlessly that they are happy or excited, accept it for what it is but do not expect smiles, laughter or tears. If you want to make a friend of a High “S”, give them their space and allow them to communicate with you at their own pace.

When attempting to communicate with a high COMPLIANT always consider that they are much more detail oriented than the other styles.

High Compliant people like rules and regulations for work and life. However, once they are confident that they are on the right path, they are highly conscientious and will act very quickly to get the job done. Because they like a lot of detail, when you speak to them, bring a lot of well-organized information and some proof that what you are saying is valid. Do not try to get a High “C” to change his mind unless you can prove that you are right. Many great accountants are highly Compliant as are a lot of pilots, engineers, musicians, and mechanics. In each of these cases, a very stringent set of rules and procedures must be employed in order to get the job done. The fact that following those procedures almost guarantees a good result appeals greatly to High “C’s”. In conversations, you can often hold their attention with spreadsheets, statistics and complex explanations. If you want to make a friend of High “C”, be prepared to dazzle them with detail and answer a lot of questions.

This article is based on the work of William Moulton Marston. Find out more in my book, “Getting Along With People Is Easy!” available at Amazon.com or from the Dynamic Leadership website: https://www.dlionline.ca/courses.php?category=Books

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

I have been successful, unsuccessful, frustrated and elated while attempting to create fabulous sales numbers for my companies. Although I do not have all of the answers to sales success, I have learned a few lessons along the way which I will share with you now.

The last company I worked for before starting my current consulting business was an international insurance firm with a large number of offices all over North America. I was the Vice President of Operations in my region and I was partnered with a Vice President of sales. We were responsible for approximately 160 employees in a dozen offices. We worked very well together because we accepted that both of us carried ominous responsibility for the success of our region and that if we did not work as team, we would surely fail.

Lesson number one: Accountability

The first thing we learned was that success requires hard work from everyone involved.

Whenever we lost focus and let up or reduced our drive for more sales our numbers would start to slide and our profitability would begin to wane. It was up to us as leaders to drive the bus and when we lost energy, the entire vehicle lost momentum.

We also learned that our sales-people responded best when we showed a great deal of interest in them, reminding them regularly that it was their responsibility to make a budgeted number of sales. We had to make it clear that just as we were accountable to our executive and shareholders, they were responsible to us and their co-workers to drive the company forward.

When we asked them for buy-in and helped them along the way they bought in but when we focussed on something other than sales effort, they took our lack of acknowledgement as a sign that the pressure was off and not surprisingly, sales dropped off. Holding sales people personally responsible for their sales effort is one of the most important elements of a successful sales organization.

Lesson number two: Support

One of the single most common reasons why people struggle to make sales budgets is a lack of personalized support.

In order to make sales, we learned that we had to accept that everyone needed a different technique when contacting and dealing with clients and that there is no single–best way to make a sale happen. We understood that each sales person naturally behaved differently than the others and that each was driven by different motivations.

We utilized specific assessment tools to understand how each of our sales people thought and we encouraged them to utilize their natural skills and talents to create their own brand of success.

We also learned to accept that everyone is not, and cannot be a superstar. We learned that as much as we had to set minimum goals that must be attained, we could not expect everyone to perform at the same level. Despite varying levels of skill and success everyone mattered. Most importantly, when one of our people was struggling, rather than finding fault or giving up on them, we offered coaching, encouragement and support to rejuvenate their enthusiasm and recharge their passion.

Lesson number three: Teamwork

Any group of people that is assembled for any purpose can only be successful if they operate as a team.

Just as this is true in athletics, it is true in the sales arena. Teams require leaders and leaders require loyal, devoted followers. A team must have a common vision that each member is able to buy into and each player must know his or her position.

We learned that as leaders, we had to reinforce the value of each member of the team from the reception people, to the accounting staff, to the administration department…because without them, the sales people would not survive. We reinforced the fact that without each member of the team paddling as fast as they could, the sales boat would not move forward. We asked them to treat each member of the team with respect all-the-while holding each other accountable for the team’s performance.

We taught them how harmful bad words and bad thoughts amongst team members could be and that intolerance would not be accepted. We let them know that every success was a team success to be shared by all members equally. We asked all team members to carry their weight as best they could and to help other team members when they stumbled. In short we helped them to understand that success was a team endeavour that required the unrelenting effort of each player.

Lesson number four: Lead by example

Leaders in great sales organizations work harder than every person on their team in order to maintain success.

There can be no room on any team for lazy, lacklustre, disengaged sales leaders or managers.Those who set the goals and enforce the activities that create the results must be fully involved and highly motivated. Their dedication to the process must be palpable and measurable. The time they put in to assist their sales force must be as great as, or preferably greater than the time each sales person and support-staff member puts in to make sales happen.

Great leaders work tirelessly and selflessly for the greater good of the team. Great leaders acknowledge that they are under the microscope and that everyone on their team is waiting for them to stumble. The best of them will be helped up by their team members when they fall…the worst will be left behind or kicked to the curb in disgust. They say that it is lonely at the top. As much as there is a smattering of truth to that statement, it can also be very rewarding and highly energizing up there. When you forget your own personal needs and wants, pushing those of your team members to the top, you will soon come to find that you have a second family that will support you and carry you on their shoulders to success.

The bottom line for leaders is that they must never give up, must always stay the course and must always work like their professional life depends on it…Because it does!

Lesson number five: Build your culture

Sales success can be sustainable or fleeting…it is your choice.

Success that is short-lived or sporadic is symptomatic of a weak sales-culture. If you have products or services to sell, you must always put sales activity at the top of your priority list. Let’s face it; you won’t need a receptionist, an accountant, or a human-resources professional if your products or services are not getting into the hands of buyers.  

If you are unhappy with your current rate of sales stop what you are doing and regroup. Many leaders believe that if they just do more of what they are currently doing, great things will happen. That may or may not be true depending on the situation. However, if your sales machine is not printing money, there is a good chance it is broken or at the very least is need of a tune up.

The best way to find out why you are not as successful as you would like to be is to do an evaluation of your corporate culture to find out how your employees and your customers feel about it. Once you have communicated with a good sampling of them to find out where the weaknesses are, start building your culture from the ground up all over again.

During the rebuilding process, be honest with yourself and willing to admit your failings. You must be willing to accept major changes if you want to succeed. Let everyone know that you want to build a powerful, sustainable culture where all of the stakeholders will share in the spoils and where everyone’s participation will be valued and acknowledged. Once the foundation is built, start bricking up the walls with solid, established business practices and employee engagement techniques. If you are not up to date on the practices of highly successful companies or simply do not know where to start, get help from outside professionals to guide you to a better path. Finally, you must be patient. Building a great corporate structure with fabulous sales results takes a lot of perseverance and a good deal of time.

Build your culture one brick at a time and watch your success grow right along with it.

All the best

Wayne Kehl

In this issue, we want to delve further into the attributes of the various elements of DISC. 

It is important to understand the basic emotions that are prominent to each element of the DISC.

•         The primary emotion of a “High Dominant” is ANGER
•         The primary emotion of a “High Influencer” is OPTIMISM/TRUST
•         The primary emotion of a “High Steady” is NON-EMOTIONAL (emotions are hidden)
•         The primary emotion of a “High Compliant” is FEAR

Note that when the scoring falls to the lower side of the scale in each of the examples given above, the emotions will be essentially the opposite of that shown. Hence, a “Lower D” will dictate patience and slowness to anger; a “Lower I” will tend to be pessimistic and lacking in trust; a “Lower S” will display more emotion; and the “Lower C” person will show little fear and take more risks.

Those basic emotions are only part of the story, however. Let’s look more closely at how the emotions of each element of DISC might manifest themselves in real life.

The High Dominant: You will generally find this person to be a director of action, a driver of activity and courageous defenders of their positions. They never shirk from controversy and they are quick to take on any argument or fight that might come their way. They are quick to anger and will usually be the ones you find ranting and raving in a loud voice in any group of people. When they have a cause to promote, they will take on anyone and climb any mountain to make it happen. They are laser-focused on results and overwhelmed by a desire to be successful. High “D’s” often make good sales people, managers, athletes and captains of industry because they are competitive to a fault and never give up.

The High Influencer: High “I’s often smile a lot and talk too much. They are expressive, enthusiastic, fun, trusting, optimistic, charming, confident and usually popular. They love to be the centre of attention and they are constantly selling themselves to everyone they meet. They are fast talkers and whenever they hear silence they fill it with charming conversation. High “I’s” need to be loved and they spend a great deal of time chatting with everyone around them in order to earn the pats on the back that they crave. They are not keen on detailed work and will often use their charm to convince others to do a lot of their support work for them. They are the funny ones you will find in any crowd…quick to tell a joke and to make a joke out of a serious subject. Occasionally they misjudge their audience and provide humour at inappropriate times. High “I’s” often make good politicians, actors, comedians and salesmen because of their love of their own voices and their need to associate with other people.

The High Steady: These folks generally relate well to others and are amiable and friendly to all they meet. They are laid back, patient, sincere and appear to be stress-free.  They are loyal to those they trust and they never quit a job until it is finished. They are aware of other people’s needs and they love to help and support their team. They tend to work slower than some others, but the work they do is unquestionably of the highest quality they are capable of producing. They don’t like to act on anything until they have the approval of people they trust and they do a lot of research to make sure they are on the right path. Because of their calm demeanour and selflessness, they make great support players for superstar High Dominants and High Influencers whose focus is mainly on themselves. They are often considered the “glue” that holds the team together. High Steady people make good assistant managers, athletes in defensive positions, nurses and teachers.

The High Compliant: The High “C” is analytical, methodical, restrained, diplomatic, accurate and precise. They like to put things into rows, columns and boxes. They thrive on planning and organization and they love rules and regulations for everything. The never fret over a mountain of minutia and they love to dot every I and cross every T. They will not make a decision without facts, figures and details. They want information in a format they can see so that they can analyse and verify it before acting on it. They have high standards and they turn in work that is as perfect as they can make it. The more complex the task, the more satisfaction they get out of doing it. Sometimes, they will slow a process down because they are not happy with the details or the amount of data they have on hand.  Due mainly to their love of complexity and precision High “C’s” make good accountants, engineers, scientists and airplane pilots.

Note: When any of the DISC scores is on the lower end of the scale, you can expect behaviour opposite to that described above.

Adaptations:  As much as these DISC elements can be very telling as to the behaviour you might expect from each person who possesses them, there are times when those people must “adapt” their behaviour in order to be successful and do a better job of fitting into general society. Here are some examples.

• When a High “D”, a High “I”, a Low “S” or a Low “C” goes to church, the environment will call for each of them to adapt their behaviour to the opposite of their natural style. If they are going to fit the church environment, they will have to adapt to become Lower “D”, Lower “I”, Higher “S” and Higher “C”.
• When a Low “C” is working on tax returns, he or she must adapt to higher “C”.
•  A high “I” salesman must adapt his style to a lower “I” in order to get through the complex sales reporting systems that they must deal with.
• When training new employees, a High “D” might have to lower his or her natural dominance considerably in order to avoid intimidating them.
•  When faced with deadlines and urgent situations, a High “S” might have to lower their steady style and speed up in order to finish on time.

Note that anyone can adapt their behaviour for short periods of time, but if they are forced to adapt to extreme levels for an extended period of time, they will ultimately become distressed, disengaged and in worst-case-scenarios might suffer from burnout. That is why it is important to match people to work that they are behaviourally suited to and put the right people into the right jobs!

In the next issue of “UNDESTANDING DISC” we will explore how the elements of DISC blend with each other within each person.

 All the Best

Wayne Kehl

 D.I.S.C. stands for:

•         DOMINANCE
•         INFLUENCE
•        STEADINESS
•        COMPLIANCE

The elements of DISC are represented by a plethora of suppliers under a variety of aliases, including but not limited to colours, temperatures, seasons, bunnies and tigers and a variety of other pseudonyms. No matter what they are called, the elements of DISC are common to all personality types and vary in intensity from one person to another.

Here is a breakdown of what DOMINANCE, INFLUENCE, STEADINESS and COMPLIANCE mean in these surveys.

DOMINANCE: This is the element of an individual’s personality that indicates competitiveness, drive and a desire to win. Highly dominant people tend become angry more often than lower dominant types. Dominance is a task oriented trait so once a highly dominant person takes on a task, they become determined to see it through to the end. These people often appear to be stern and severe. Once they have had an angry outburst, they forget the source of their anger quickly and move on to other things. Highly dominant people will often be seen as intimidating by others.

INFLUENCE: This is the element of an individual’s personality that indicates optimism, trust, and a sense of humour. Highly influencing people tend to joke around a lot, talk a lot, and use other people to get what they want out of life. Almost completely people-oriented, they need to be in the company of other human beings as often as possible. Highly influencing people like flashy, expensive cars, clothing, houses and virtually anything else they can show off. They are optimistic to a fault and trust almost everyone a little too much.  Highly influencing people will often be seen as the life of the party by others.

STEADINESS: This is the element of an individual’s personality that regulates the pace at which they do things. Highly steady people tend to hold off on decision making until they believe the decision is the right one. They like to do research and get the approval of others before they do almost anything. They are people-oriented and will usually be very sociable with everyone they meet. Highly steady people will take longer to do their work, but because they are very thorough, the work they do is generally of very high quality. Others will often see them as logical, thoughtful members of the team.

COMPLIANCE: This is the element of an individual’s personality that creates a need for rules and regulations in their lives. Highly compliant people tend to approach every challenge or project with caution and concern. Because they are task oriented, they tend not to fall for a sales pitch that is not accompanied by facts and figures. They are fearful of not following rules to the point that if no rules exist, some will make up their own rules and insist that others follow them. They are often seen by others as overly careful, unbending and somewhat resistant to “outside the box” thinking.

BLENDING:

 It is important to understand that every personality has all of these elements in it to varying degrees. In other words, some will be highly dominant and low compliant, with a very low steady style and a moderate influencing style.

Understanding how the various elements of the DISC blend with each other is extremely important.  Hence, you should avoid referring to someone as HIGH DOMINANT or LOW COMPLIANT since all of the 4 elements will come into play in a variety of situations.

In future issues we will discuss DISC blending and the effects of intensity on overall behaviour.

If you are interested in taking a survey or ordering one for someone else, please click on this link to order   https://www.dlionline.ca/courses.php

Anger should not be allowed to lead you through life.

Once while conducting a performance review, I had the opportunity to have a discussion with an employee about the attitude she displayed with other employee in her workplace. The general observations from others about this person were that she was miserable, unpleasant and downright mean. She was quite aware of her reputation and was completely unrepentant about it.  She actually seemed to take comfort in the fact that she was able to make her mark in life by repelling other people.

Just as some people take comfort in their own despair, some wallow in their own repugnance to others.

This lady did not smile, did not frown, did not laugh; did not cry…she seemed in fact to be completely devoid of any and all emotion. Most of her responses to my questions were comprised of one-word answers, shoulder shrugs and grunts. The more I spoke to her, the more unresponsive she became. Finally, I felt compelled to tell her that I was concerned about her attitude toward me. At that point, she bragged that most people don’t like her attitude and that she had recently enrolled in an anger-management course because of “other issues”.

I asked if anger was a big part of her life and she responded in the affirmative.

At that point I noticed, for the first time, a small curl of a smile at the corners of her lips. That prompted me to ask her if she enjoyed being angry. She quickly responded, with a full-toothed smile, “Yup, I sure do!”

Through further discussion, I learned that this person had lived a very difficult life which included abusive parents, a history of drug and alcohol abuse, and a nasty divorce. It became clear to me that the events of her childhood had left her with a very negative view of the world and a need to escape it through potentially harmful behaviour. Her past also led her to uncontrollable bouts of rage and anti-social behaviour.  Because she was unable to overcome her personal issues, her life was a mess and her future was extremely bleak. Despite the fact that she was clearly spiralling into oblivion, she refused to accept that she needed to change. I have lost touch with her over the years, but I fear the worst.

This lady’s story is much more extreme than most, but many people suffer from the inability to control their emotions.

 Some of those people carry around a well concealed hand grenade filled with explosive rage. For much of the time the grenade is hidden, but often it is just waiting for the pin to be pulled so that it can explode and splatter hot, angry, emotional shrapnel all over anyone unfortunate enough to be in its path of destruction.

Anger is not only wasted energy…it is a powerful, harmful force that has the capacity to destroy lives and end careers.

Psychological science has identified a condition known as “Borderline Personality Disorder” which is known to bring on the symptoms of uncontrollable rage that I have describe here. Theorists and psychologists agree that this disorder is often a result of disturbing traumatic events from an individual’s childhood. Sometimes the person is not even aware of, or cannot remember the event or events that may be causing their distress. Instead, they will often inflict their rage on others, all-the-while justifying it as something positive and a personality trait that other people should simply accept or become accustomed to. What they seem not to understand is that their behaviour is unacceptable in a civilized society and that they are systematically driving people away.

Even people who are not the direct object of their rage will avoid any sort of meaningful relationship with them out of fear and revulsion.

I have known a few angry bosses over the years, but until recently I simply chalked it up to an old-fashioned command and control style of leadership. I now believe that some of the rage I witnessed in those leaders was a result of an undiagnosed psychological or emotional condition. Those leaders were able to hide their conditions behind their positions because unpleasant, angry bosses like Ebenezer Scrooge and Lou Grant were the stuff of popular culture and entertainment. During that era, we all knew that to be a leader, you had to be tough; and to be tough, you had to express anger.

Modern society now agrees that anger towards others is neither normal nor acceptable regardless of one’s position in life.

Psychologists have found that professional “talk-therapy” or coaching can provide extremely good results and a lessening, or complete elimination of inexplicable, long-term, rage events. Of course, that will only work if the individual inflicted with the problem is able to admit to himself or herself that his or her behaviour is unacceptable. They must also be willing to look in the mirror and tell the person looking back that a change is absolutely essential. Acknowledgement of the problem is often much more difficult to endure than the eventual therapy.

If you have feelings of anger that cause fear or discomfort in others, do something about it. Admit that you have a problem and take steps to deal with it. You owe it to yourself to allow tranquility and contentment to overrule the exasperation, rage and despair in your life.

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

Valentine’s Day first became associated with romance during the days of the great poet, Geoffrey Chaucer in the late 1300’s. In 1382, Chaucer wrote in his poem Parlement of Foules or Parliament of Birds, “For this was Saint Valentine’s Day, when every bird cometh there to choose his mate.” That poem actually had more to do with Mother Nature and the mating habits of birds than with human love. Despite that, it managed to find its way into western culture and to this day it provides an opportunity for women and men to express profound love for their mates.

Many human beings in this century need a special day to declare their love for each other.

Valentine’s Day functions as a reminder to everyone that explicit expressions of romantic love are important for the maintenance of healthy relationships. It doesn’t stop at pure, innocent love though. Candy stores, jewellery merchants, flower shops, restaurants and “Hallmark” cards all rake in huge amounts of much needed revenue on that special day. In fact many of them rely on Valentine’s Day sales for financial survival.

Lovers in the twenty first century cannot simply satisfy each other with kind words, cuddles, kisses and lovemaking as they might have in the 1300’s. Instead they feel a need to spend some money in order to prove their love and devotion to each other. It seems that our modern world has replaced natural, wholesome relationships where love is based on simple caring and sharing with relationships where love is measured by the amount of currency expended on it. That may sound somewhat cynical, but if given the choice between a kiss on the lips, a box of chocolates, or an exotic vacation as a Valentine’s gift, which would the average North American prefer? Which would they be more impressed by and which would they be more likely to remember in years to come? I think the answer is obvious.

It would be nice to think that when lovers sacrifice their cash for their mates, they are emulating St. Valentine who sacrificed his life for his religion.

Sadly that is probably not the case. We live in a world where the value of money has taken on such epic importance that it has become synonymous with, and inseparable from expressions of generosity, charity, kindness, and yes…love itself.

This Valentine’s Day why not break out of the mold?

Now that we know that St. Valentine’s died not for his lover, but for his religion, let’s do something more meaningful than buying candy, jewellery or trips.

Why not spend the night at home just cuddling and kissing and give the money you save to a worthy charity?  That way we can show our love for mankind, and uphold some of the principles that St. Valentine died for. After all, there are a lot of people in the world who need help and there are worse things than cuddling and kissing the one you love.

Valentine’s Day really is for lovers!

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

Do you ever think bad thoughts about yourself?

Here is an easier question: “Are You Human?” If your answer to this one is YES, then you can honestly answer YES to the first two questions. Bad thoughts are human but we should not let them control us.

Human beings, above all other animals on the planet possess the wonderful ability to reason. In most situations we tend to think before we act. Unlike less intelligent species, before we do almost anything, we imagine possible results and potential pitfalls. We think about how our actions and reactions might help us, harm us, propel us forward or hold us back. We thrive on information and we fill our heads with all kinds of thoughts and ideas about how we should live our lives. We are the superior species on earth because we think a lot, learn a lot, reason a lot and do a lot of incredible things after a good deal of intellectual assessment.

Sometimes because of external influences or internal fears, our thoughts become negative.

We might imagine that someone or something in our lives might harm us in some way or we might think that for some reason, we are not capable of doing something that we need to do in order to succeed. When our thoughts turn to black, our mood will change for the worse and our performance will begin to lag. During those down periods we will often say or do things that are not characteristic of our usual behavior. In the worst cases, we might even strike out at those around us or withdraw into solitude in order to avoid the source of our trepidations. We might turn away from people who matter to us and people who only want the best for us.

The worst thing about bad thoughts is that they put our lives on hold.

While we are under the control of bad thoughts, we stop trying, we stop doing and we fail to get on with living. We should never allow a bad thought to stop us from doing something that must be done or something that we really want to do. Despite the fact that we all want to avoid them, human beings allow bad thoughts to consume them and take charge of their lives every day! Bad thoughts, when allowed to rule are the enemies of optimism, the thieves of enthusiasm and the killers of motivation.

Often our bad thoughts will consume us for extended periods.

During those times, we will be depressed, impatient, uncommunicative, anxious or confrontational. Our human, negative energy will bubble to the surface and change our normal demeanour into something that is unpalatable to others. In essence our internal bad thoughts can ultimately become our external reality as we drive people away from us while becoming sad, lonely spectres of our normal selves.

Do not allow your bad thoughts to control you. Here are some tips to help you recognize and take control of your own negative energy. You can do all of them, some of them, or just one. The important thing is to do something.

When a bad thought enters your mind:

1. ASK YOURSELF, “WHAT IS THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN?” (If the answer does not include death or physical harm, you will be much more likely to move past it.)
2. SETTLE DOWN. (Take a deep breath and think about some good things in your life. Tell yourself that you are a good person with a good life and that you can get beyond the current set-back.)
3. SAY IT OUT LOUD. (You can say it alone behind closed doors, or you can say it to a trusted confidant. Once you have verbalized your thoughts, they become much easier to deal with.)
4. TALK TO A FRIEND, A CLOSE RELATIVE, A TRUSTED CO-WORKER OR SOMEONE ELSE WHO WILL LISTEN. (You need to hear an alternative point-of-view in order to put things into perspective.)
5. SEEK OUT A RESOLUTION. (You can work on the problem with another person or you can think of a variety of courses of action and positive resolutions on your own.)
6. WRITE IT DOWN. (Write down the bad thought and read it over. Then right down all of the possible outcomes of it…both positive and negative. When you see it in writing it will take on a different look.)
7. IF IT INVOLVES ANOTHER PERSON, GIVE THEM A BREAK. (Think about the fact that nothing good ever comes from negativity and that forgiveness is the antidote to hard feelings.)
8. CONFRONT IT HEAD-ON. (If you have a bad thought, it has to be given life before it can die a natural death. Face the situation and deal with it in an open, honest, courageous but sensitive way.)
9. FORGIVE YOURSELF. (Human beings tend to be hard on themselves. You need to be able to accept that you will make mistakes sometimes and that you are better than you think you are.)
10. DEAL WITH IT RIGHT AWAY! (Do not allow a bad thought to grow and fester in your mind. If left unfettered a bad though can grow into a major tragedy or a life-changing trauma before you know it.

Overcoming bad thoughts must be a deliberate, conscious and extraordinarily positive act.

From now on, when a bad thought enters your mind remember that it must not be allowed to control you.  Take time out of your busy day to think about it, eliminate it, and move on to more positive thoughts as quickly as you can.

All the Best!

Wayne Kehl

~Benjamin Franklin 

Oh, if we could all just follow Benjamin Franklin’s advice, what a wonderful world it would be. Why must we all find fault with each other while carrying anger and hatred into the world? Why do so many of us want to see others fail so that we can succeed and why do we defend our lies as if they are truths?  

Why are human beings so flawed, and why is each one of us so tragically human? 

During the Christmas season the world is full of love and goodwill toward all mankind. Almost immediately after that, the New Year comes along and millions of folks make resolutions that most will never comply with. For those two days of the year we practice universal love and make conscious decisions to be better men and women. For the rest of the year, most of us simply go back to being the people we are and have always been with the inevitable consequences…wars rage on, crime rates escalate, court room waiting lists get longer, people die in alcohol related accidents, ordinary people die from substance abuse, others die from lung cancer, strokes, heart disease and violence; obesity levels grow and we all continue our race to self-induced oblivion.

It seems that most of us cannot sustain a conscious effort to be better men and women for more than a couple of days each year. 

This year, why not become a leader to everyone in your life? 

Why not set the example by overcoming your vices, putting aside your anger, adopting an attitude of pure positive thoughts and actions and by making a concerted effort to be a better person? 

Can you do it? Can you be the one person who will make a difference? You probably cannot change the world single-handedly, but you can make a difference in your environment and you can make improvements in your own life that others will notice. Forget about societal, cultural, employment related, success driven, peer pressure-induced urges and just do what you know is right. Resist the vices that you know are not helping you succeed, always put on a smile for everyone you meet, reach for positive thoughts in every situation and always do your best. Most importantly, make a deliberate effort to be a better person. If you do that, you will never suffer from guilt of any kind and you will be a model for everyone you meet. In some way, large or small, you will be a leader of mankind.  

Benjamin Franklin lived from 1706 to 1790 and yet he observed the same human behaviour that we all live with in 2011. Take a page out of his book and be someone who leads others to a better world.  

It is never too late and it will always be noticed and appreciated.

All the Best!

Wayne Kehl

 ~ Charles Dickens (1812-1870), English author. From, “A Christmas Carol”

I was quite taken by this quote from Charles Dickens. This line from “A Christmas Carol” reminds us of the fact that for most people, the true spirit of kindness and giving is with us for only one day of each year. As much as we might like to honour the spirit of Christmas throughout the year, it is not long after December 25th that we return to our old habits and vices…we return to being normal, flawed human beings.

People of many lands have chosen Christmas as a reason to be kind, generous, and warm to all others. 

Large scale wars all over the world will have cease-fires during the Christmas holiday. People who seldom speak take the time to write and send greeting cards to each other. Everywhere you go people of all races, creeds, colours and genders can be heard shouting, “Merry Christmas!” to almost anyone they come into contact with. Despite the commercial implications of it, Christmas genuinely brings peace on earth and goodwill to all men and women. Smiles abound and anger is put on hold for two or three glorious days. Everyone seems to want to impose the best part of mankind on everyone else during the few days surrounding December 25th.

How sad it is that we cannot carry those good feelings, thoughts, emotions and actions with us 365 days of every year.

If we could just remember the deep seated emotions that flood our hearts, souls, and minds on Christmas morning; if we could only treat everyone the way we treated our friends and family during Christmas dinner; if we could just feel that way and treat everyone with that much kindness all year long, the world would be a glorious place indeed.

Like Ebenezer Scrooge, try to honour the Christmas spirit all year long. You will be rewarded with the gift of joy and the precious present of a peaceful mind.

Merry Christmas to one and all!

Wayne Kehl 

http://youtu.be/yKJHDhNcIco

Can a woman be a great leader of men?

If we are going to have an intelligent discussion about women in leadership positions firstly we must accept that women and men do not, and should not lead in the same fashion. Women think differently than men and their natural tendencies are driven by different motives than men. In short, women and men are different!

Women who want to be great leaders should not devalue their femininity by emulating the leadership traits of men. They should instead, celebrate their femaleness by bringing all of the amazing female qualities that they have at their disposal to their leadership positions. They should think like women, act like women and look like women at all times. Women who change their inherent style to become more like men when they move into leadership positions are fooling no one. We all know they are women and we become uncomfortable when they appear to be moving away from their natural female roles.

Women make up fifty percent of the population. Because of the plethora of ladies around us, men understand what makes the fairer sex tick. Most men have undying love and respect for their mothers and would do almost anything to support and protect them. They will step in front of a hurtling freight train to save their wives from harm and would fight a grizzly bear with a small stick to defend their daughters. Men are hard-wired to treat women well and to do everything they can to make their lives better.

Despite the natural tendency of men to protect women from harm, bullying and sexual harassment are not uncommon in the workplace. When the testosterone-driven positions of power that men hold dear are threatened by the scent of female hormones, they tend to drop their naturally protective instincts and go into fight-mode. If a woman in a superior position takes on an aggressive, demanding stance, many men will see her as the enemy and will do any number of unspeakable things to engineer her demise. Even women will see a dominant, masculine leadership style from another woman as foreign and unpalatable.

The best way for me to illustrate a good female leadership style is to provide an example of a great female leader that I have actually worked with…I will call her Debbie for the purposes of this story.

Debbie was known to be intelligent, knowledgeable and conscientious. For decades she performed well in important project management and product development positions. She was a great resource for a large number of employees, managers, and executive leaders. She was well regarded, well liked and highly valued for her work. The day she was promoted to Vice President of Sales however, marked a change in the way almost everyone in the company viewed her and in the general expectations everyone had of her. It is very important to note that this was a position that had only been occupied by men in the past. Debbie was given responsibility not only for the overall sales of her division, but for the day-to-day sales activities of a large number of aggressive, mature, crusty salesmen who were set in their ways. They had never been lead by a woman and they had no idea what to expect.

Debbie had a big choice to make. She could continue to be the intelligent, kind, nurturing female she had always been or she could morph into a hard, demanding, command and control leader. If she had betrayed her natural tendencies to care for and nurture her direct reports, she might have failed. However, she had enough faith in herself to avoid becoming something she was not and instead led her division with kindness, caring and a nurturing spirit. She held her direct reports accountable but instead of making demands and finding fault, she offered support and encouragement. When things went badly, she proactively offered her help and rather than criticizing, lecturing or disciplining, she coached, counselled and assisted. When things went well, she provided acknowledgement, praise and celebration. At all times, she exuded pride in her team and she fought for them like a mother bear. Her devotion to her work-family was obvious to all and it was rewarded with true loyalty and almost universal respect.

In fairness, it is safe to say that Debbie had to work harder and put in more effort than any man in the position before her in order to win over the men who reported to her. However, within a year she had gained their respect and admiration. Once she had made her mark as a serious leader, it was not uncommon to hear her male reports singing her praises and making it clear that she was the best sales manager they had ever worked with. They knew that she cared about them and that she was there for them no matter what happened. She also became an icon for female employees who admired her and considered her a role model for all other women in business.

 She thought like a woman; she acted like a woman; she looked like a woman…and she succeeded like a man!

Can a woman be a great leader of men? Yes she can but only if she remembers to always be a woman!

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

If you answered yes to any of those questions, trouble might be just around the corner!  

Every person on earth needs a reasonable and suitable work/life balance.  While they might impress you with their industriousness and loyalty and your firm might be reveling in the fruits of their labors, they are probably working toward an eventual, total meltdown. 

Every person has a different level of stress that they can comfortably absorb or disregard before they hit an emotional wall.  

¨      Some people love their work so much that they do not even consider it work. Those are the people who are constantly smiling while they do their jobs.

¨      Others simply press the outer edges of their emotional control because of insecurity or fear. They are afraid they might let someone down or fail altogether.

¨      Some employees just look stressed-out, weary, or frustrated at all times. These people are on the edge and close to a complete collapse.

You might think that those folks who energetically ply their trade with smiles all day long because they love what they do, don’t need or want down-time or an actual holiday. You might think those hard workers who apply themselves with dedication to everything they do are well adjusted and simply more capable than the average human being.  You might think that the weary, frustrated people are just lazy or ill suited to their work. In each of these cases the bottom line is that all of these people needs reasonable work/life balance and time off to get their minds, and more importantly, their emotions off of their work.

It is up to managers, supervisors and leaders of all kinds to recognize the symptoms of poor work/life balance and find ways to deal with them.  

Leaders must always keep track of over-work situations and must never make any employee feel bad or negligent for taking their fair share of time off. Not only will they be doing their employees a favor by assisting them with this chronic, twenty-first century problem but also in many cases, they will be saving themselves and their companies a lot of lost time and lost revenue.

Even those happy, smiling people who love their work and never seem to tire out need time off.

They might be energized by their work, but their total dedication to their jobs is often damaging to the health of their family and personal lives. Without a happy, healthy life away from work, human beings become unfilled and ultimately, unhappy or depressed. Sometimes the pressures placed on them by their neglected families and friends might be more than their psyche’s can handle. If you ignore a happy, hard-worker you might suddenly be faced with an unexpected sick leave, performance dip, or even a resignation from them. The toll taken by total dedication to work has proven to be the undoing of many a potential superstar employee.

Companies of all types and sizes should insist that employees at all levels work reasonable hours and that everyone take the holidays they are allotted each year.

If employees want to work additional hours on a special project, they should be granted additional time off at a more convenient juncture. If they are doing community work that enhances the image of their employer in the community, they should be allowed time during working hours to do it. If they are on holidays, they should be prevented from taking work home with them or from communicating work-related information back to their place of work.

Time off should be considered as important as “time on” in order to assure that employees are happy and healthy well into the future.

If you haven’t spent some time reviewing the down time of your employees and you want to keep them on staff and working to peak performance, you should do so now. Have a staff meeting specifically to discuss the human need for time away from work. Emphasize the fact that there is very little honor in diligence that goes so far beyond the norm that it becomes hazardous to future performance. Let everyone know that it is not only the right, but also the responsibility of every employee to take the time off that they are provided. Tell them there will be no extra credit for time-off-not-taken. Most importantly, let all of your employees know that you care about their emotional and physical health.

Good work/life balance is a predictor of longevity and good future performance.

Help your employees to stay emotionally fit by assisting them in finding and retaining the balance they deserve.

 All the Best!

Wayne Kehl

Women who want to be great leaders should not devalue their femininity by emulating the leadership traits of men.

 They should instead, celebrate their femaleness by bringing all of the amazing female qualities that they have at their disposal to their leadership positions. They should think like women, act like women and look like women at all times. Women who change their inherent style to become more like men when they move into leadership positions are fooling no one. We all know they are women and we become uncomfortable when they appear to be moving away from their natural female roles.

Women make up fifty percent of the population. Because of the plethora of ladies around us, men understand what makes the fairer sex tick. Most men have undying love and respect for their mothers and would do almost anything to support and protect them. They will step in front of a hurtling freight train to save their wives from harm and would fight a grizzly bear with a small stick to defend their daughters. Men are hard-wired to treat women well and to do everything they can to make their lives better.

Despite the natural tendency of men to protect women from harm, bullying and sexual harassment are not uncommon in the workplace.

 When the testosterone-driven positions of power that men hold dear are threatened by the scent of female hormones, they tend to drop their naturally protective instincts and go into fight-mode. If a woman in a superior position takes on an aggressive, demanding stance, many men will see her as the enemy and will do any number of unspeakable things to engineer her demise. Even women will see a dominant, masculine leadership style from another woman as foreign and unpalatable.

The best way for me to illustrate a good female leadership style is to provide an example of a great female leader that I have actually worked with…I will call her Debbie for the purposes of this story.

Debbie was known to be intelligent, knowledgeable and conscientious. For decades she performed well in important project management and product development positions. She was a great resource for a large number of employees, managers, and executive leaders. She was well regarded, well liked and highly valued for her work. The day she was promoted to Vice President of Sales however, marked a change in the way almost everyone in the company viewed her and in the general expectations everyone had of her. It is very important to note that this was a position that had only been occupied by men in the past. Debbie was given responsibility not only for the overall sales of her division, but for the day-to-day sales activities of a large number of aggressive, mature, crusty salesmen who were set in their ways. They had never been lead by a woman and they had no idea what to expect.

Debbie had a big choice to make.

She could continue to be the intelligent, kind, nurturing female she had always been or she could morph into a hard, demanding, command and control leader. If she had betrayed her natural tendencies to care for and nurture her direct reports, she might have failed. However, she had enough faith in herself to avoid becoming something she was not and instead led her division with kindness, caring and a nurturing spirit. She held her direct reports accountable but instead of making demands and finding fault, she offered support and encouragement. When things went badly, she proactively offered her help and rather than criticizing, lecturing or disciplining, she coached, counselled and assisted. When things went well, she provided acknowledgement, praise and celebration. At all times, she exuded pride in her team and she fought for them like a mother bear. Her devotion to her work-family was obvious to all and it was rewarded with true loyalty and almost universal respect.

In fairness, it is safe to say that Debbie had to work harder and put in more effort than any man in the position before her in order to win over the men who reported to her. However, within a year she had gained their respect and admiration. Once she had made her mark as a serious leader, it was not uncommon to hear her male reports singing her praises and making it clear that she was the best sales manager they had ever worked with. They knew that she cared about them and that she was there for them no matter what happened. She also became an icon for female employees who admired her and considered her a role model for all other women in business.

She thought like a woman; she acted like a woman; she looked like a woman…and she succeeded like a man!

Can a woman be a great leader of men? Yes she can but only if she remembers to always be a woman!

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

http://motivationalkehl.blogspot.com/2011/10/ten-ways-to-make-your-employees-adore.html

As a young man, I had not considered that my Levi’s might become a matter of contention in my family when I became a father.

My teenage children wanted “designer” jeans, created by a variety of high priced cloth-cutters with odd sounding names. Gone were Levi’s, GWG, and Lee jeans…In were Tommy Hilfiger, Armani and Tommy Bahama, all of whom made jeans that cost much more than my Levi’s. My kids made a point of letting me know that I was totally out of step and needed a complete denim makeover in order to move from fuddy-duddy to cool dad status. Sadly, I never made it to that lofty level of youthful social acceptance.

Much to the chagrin of my kids, I doggedly stuck with my Levi’s. I refused to change. I was determined to stay the course and wear my Levi’s in the face of humiliation and potential ridicule from every teenager and cool dad in the world. I was set in my ways and nothing short of a mugging at gun-point could force me into designer jeans.

Just as I failed as a cool dad, many managers and executives continue to fail as successful leaders today.

Too many leaders believe that the old ways are the right ways or the only ways. A lot of Boomer and Generation X leaders believe that we need to get back to basics; return to sanity, and bring back the good old days.

Guess what folks…The good old days are gone…They will never return!

Successful leaders in the twenty first century understand that in order to be successful they must drop many of the old ways and move to a new style of people-management. Change is difficult and the older we get, the more difficult it becomes for us to accept new things. That is human nature and it is not likely to change any time soon. However, if we stand in the way of the steam-roller of change, we will surely be flattened like the pavement of a highway leading to the oblivion of bankruptcy.

Young people eventually become old people and when that happens they take over the world.

Because we will have so many Boomers leaving the workforce during this decade, we will have a faster than usual transition to the new guard…As the holders of the purse-strings and the possessors of the thrones-of-power move to retirement, they will be replaced by younger people who will demand a new world order.

When the young power-brokers take over, gone will be command and control management and gone will be the hierarchical class structures that govern most North American businesses today. Gone will be the concept that the boss is always right and gone will be the idea that employees have to do what they are told unconditionally. The new-guard will wear tee shirts and designer jeans on Wall Street and because letter-writing will be a lost art, they will text their way to success. They will eliminate boring board meetings where a few grey-haired men decide the fate of thousands and they will distribute their company’s wealth in a more equitable, almost quasi-socialistic manner.

Ironically, the new-guard were trained as children by the same old-guard that is currently resisting the changes that are as inevitable as a morning sunrise.

We, the Boomers, taught our children to be fair, to stand up for themselves, to take their rightful place in the world, to distrust corporations, to detest Governments, and to make the world a better place for everyone of every race, creed, colour, gender, religion, height, width, sexual bias, from any social circle and from either side of the tracks. We have changed our children’s perceptions of social order and they will soon run their corporations with the values that we so vehemently drummed into them.

If we want our businesses to be strong and live into the future, we need to start changing our management styles now. We need to adapt to the new world order and allow our future leaders the freedom to bring their new ways into our companies. Many companies have already started this new way of doing business and have been very successful with it. They understand that corporate hierarchy, executive superiority and grey pin-striped suits are no longer necessary for success.

Forward thinking leaders understand that in the very near future most of their customers and employees will be members of the much-dreaded Generation “Y” and that they must change their ways of thinking, managing and leading now if they want their brands to live on into the future.

I am a Boomer, very near the end of my career. I still wear my Levi’s and I am still a proud fuddy-duddy.  As much as very little has changed about me, I understand that the designer-jeans-wearing leaders of the future will be every bit as successful as the Levi’s wearing crew that I grew up with. I also accept that with or without my help, they will create a new social order that will be completely appropriate for its time. The future is inevitable and in my eyes, it looks bright!

I officially have stopped standing in the way of progress but I will never change my jeans!

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

DAZED AND CONFUSED.

 In every generation, there are keeners; those amazingly talented, intelligent, resourceful people who know what they are good at, what they want, and how to go out and get it. However, many of the young people who graduate from high school and make their way into the workforce every year are frankly, dazed and confused…they don’t know what to do and they are afraid of what the future holds. Through no fault of their own, they are aimless and lost in a sea of bewilderment.

YOU MADE THEM WHAT THEY ARE.

Considering the amazing amount of contradiction and misinformation that Boomer and Generation “X” parents have tossed at Generation “Y” all their lives, it is no wonder many of them are aimless. They have been praised, protected, doted on and rewarded by parents and teachers all of their lives. They have no idea what overcoming obstacles means and they have a profound lack of understanding of the subtleties and cruelties of the business world. They have been taught to believe in themselves and have an ingrained faith that they will succeed. However, as they near the precipice of independence, they are beginning to realize that neither their parents nor teachers prepared them for real jobs in the real world. They simply have no idea what they might excel at or where their talents might be best utilized.

Generation “Y” has a fundamental belief that they should never settle for second best. They want to start at the top of the pay scale and they believe they should have everything their parents have, almost immediately after they leave home. Because of their liberal and generous upbringings, many young folks make it all the way to high school graduation without ever contemplating the fact that they will ultimately be singularly responsible for their own lives. Imagine the horror of leaving the nest without a mature, functional pair of wings!

THEY HAVE NO DIRECTION.

Parents and teachers in most cases have done a less than effective job of preparing our young people for the real world.  They did not encourage them into any particular profession or career path. Oh sure, they bought them laptop computers and I-phones and they told them they would be great at whatever they did as long as they did their best, but they did not map out a clear path for adult success.  Many parents and teachers told kids that they should become computer literate, get a good education and avoid dirty jobs where physical labour is involved.  Of course, they wanted the best for their kids when they provided all of that support, but they did not think it through; they did not balance their encouragement and advice with research and practicality so that they could provide clear direction to their progeny. Hence, many of our youths are wandering the streets, avenues, and shopping malls of North America with a deeply embedded sense of despair and no clear plan for their lives. Here is what they might be thinking:

“Should I be a doctor, a lawyer, a pharmacist, a writer, a teacher, a computer programmer, a rock star, a movie star, a disc jockey, an entrepreneur, an employee, a CEO or a taxi driver? Mom and Dad told me I would do well at anything I tried but what in the name of Bill Gates and Britney Spears, should I try? I don’t know what to do!” 

WHAT IS THE ANSWER? HOW CAN WE FIX IT?

 It is never too late to help your children find their true calling. The first thing you need to do is sit down with them and ask them what they want to do. Do not assume that what you want for them is the right thing because if you try to force them to do something that you feel would make a wonderful occupation for them you might find that it is quite the opposite of what they want. In the worst case scenario you might also eventually find out that they are simply not capable of doing well at it after spending thousands of dollars on education costs. Let’s face it, everyone cannot be a great surgeon or a skilled airline pilot and in both cases, the practitioners of those occupations must be extremely good at what they do. Just doing their best when their best is not good enough will not cut it.

Create an unthreatening, safe environment and have an open, honest discussion with your kids about what they want and then agree to help them achieve it. If they are completely confused and simply have no idea what they want to do, you might have to dig deeper. In that case, you can employ a professional employment counsellor to work with him or her. That can be quite costly however, so for much less expense, you can do a skills and talent assessment that will point you both in the right direction. Most assessments can be done online with a report generated on your computer within seconds of the survey being completed. They are very accurate and extremely helpful. For maximum clarity and impartiality you should have a trained professional debrief you and your son or daughter on the report. Once you have been through it, you will have a much better idea of what sort of occupation your kids belong in.

THE FIRST STEP IS RECOGNIZING THAT YOUR KIDS MIGHT NOT HAVE A CLEAR DIRECTION FOR THE FUTURE.

Once you have accepted that they have no plan for the future, ask them if they know where they want go and what they want to do. Make it clear that even though their direction might not be what you expected, it is okay with you and that you will support them.  Do not make the assumption that they will get by on their brilliance and sparkling personalites. Although they might seem mature to you, they are just young impressionable people who need a boost from you to make the next big step in their lives.

You created them and they are yours from birth until death. You owe them every opportunity to succeed.

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

No two leaders are the same. They all have their own distinct style. Some exude kindness and warmth while others reek of authority and influence. Some lead by example while others lead through delegation.  Some do things on impulse and immediate action while others are methodical and unhurried. These are products of individual personalities and no one style is better than another. They can all create success when fused with the essential elements of leadership.

No matter what style you might have, you can earn the adoration of your employees.

HERE ARE THE TEN ESSENTIAL ELEMENTS OF LEADERSHIP ADORATION:

1. In order to be adored as a leader you must listen to the people who work with you. Listening is an indication of respect. It shows that you are interested in them and that what they have to say matters. Most importantly, it shows that they have so much value that you will give up your most precious leadership commodity for them…your time.
2.  If you want adoration, talk to your people. Tell them what you are thinking. Tell them about yourself. Let them know that you are human and that you have the same fears, feelings, problems and concerns that they do. If you make yourself human to them they will be compelled to support and protect you when the need arises.
3. You must control your emotionsif you expect true adoration from your followers. Angry, depressed, impatient, sad, giddy, or moody people cannot gain respect and will not be taken seriously by anyone.  A calm, even demeanour with moments of obvious excitement (at appropriate times) will show followers that you are in control of yourself and therefore more likely to be someone of good character and a strong mind.
4. Adorable people have a sense of humour. A dour, humourless demeanour might seem appropriate in some situations, but a regular diet of it in a leadership position is a morale killer. When people say things to you that they think are funny…laugh! It is not a hard thing to do. Only laugh at appropriate things and when offering your own humour, make sure you do not cross the line of inappropriateness. Work should not be punishment and it follows that a joyful workplace is a productive workplace. If you are not exhibiting humour from time to time, you have not realized your full leadership potential.
5. Make yourself available and adoration will follow. If you are truly leading, you are visible, available and transparent. Stop making excuses for not spending time with your followers. Get up from your desk and talk to them. When they want to speak with you in private, stop what you are doing (if possible) and talk to them. When they have a problem, listen to them with an open mind and do everything in your power to help them through it. Be their omnipresent symbol of strength.
6. Trust your employees and they will adore you.  The greatest display of respect you can show an employee is to trust him or her to do the job properly, on time and on budget. Once the training phase is over and you know they are competent, leave them alone and do not meddle. Ask for progress reports and occasional performance evaluations but during the course of the workday, leave them alone and only attempt to help when they ask.  The only interference you should present is a pat on the back for a job well done or a celebration for a special success.  Your trust in them will be returned with respect and admiration for you.
7. Communicate with your people and they will adore you. One of the most common complaints from employees is that they have little or no communication with management. What they want is more than idle chat. They want to know what is going on, what the vision of the company is, what your personal vision is, the financial strength and growth of the company, and where the company is going. They want to be an integral part of the organization and the more you tell them about where the company is taking them, the more they will admire you.
8. To be adored you must always be cognizant of how you present yourself. Unlike some other human beings, leaders must always dress appropriately, clean and groom themselves appropriately, speak clearly and concisely and act in a politically correct fashion. Sloppy, slovenly, smelly people seldom make good leaders.  People who mumble, speak too softly, tell dirty jokes or use a lot of foul language have difficulty gaining respect from followers or superiors. If you are having trouble finding adoration at work, give yourself an honest personal evaluation and make the necessary changes.
9. If you fight for your employees you can become the most adored leader of all. Followers want their leaders to be bold, courageous, loyal warriors who will support them, protect them and speak highly of them at all times.  Leaders who put their own success and safety second to that of their employees will be held in high regard. Leaders who get involved when employees get into conflicts or bravely put themselves into the middle of customer confrontations are the most revered of all. If you make it clear to your people that you will be the last person into the life raft if the ship starts to go down you will be adored beyond your wildest imagination.
10. Honesty is an adorable trait. Dishonesty is not!  Big lies, small lies, promises not kept, and promises conveniently forgotten are all reasons for leadership catastrophe. No one wants to be lied to. If you always do unto others as you would have them do unto you and never tell an untruth you are on the path to adoration and leadership success.

Leadership is not easy, but by practising these few simple tenets you can enhance your leadership style and move to a higher level of success.

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

WARNING: IF YOU RECOGNIZE YOURSELF IN ANY PART OF THIS ARTICLE, YOU MIGHT ALREADY BE A BAD LEADER!

Bad leaders fall into ten categories. People who are not capable of establishing a solid base of loyal, devoted followers can be identified by one or more of the following traits:

1.       Command and Control leaders…It is “my way or the highway” for these folks. They fly around like chickens with their heads cut off, make a lot of demands, and rule by intimidation. Nothing is ever good enough for them.
2.      Non-leading Leaders…These are the leaders who either hide in their offices reading, emailing and holding the phone to their ear all day or leaders who are often absent from the workplace on the guise of doing important work somewhere else. They sometimes do not know the names of their employees and add little or nothing to the workplace experience.
3.      Know-nothing Leaders…Leaders who managed to get into a job leading something they have little or no knowledge of and often have no intention of learning. They try to inspire through some sort of personal style but their lack of knowledge of the department they control is evident to all. They are usually not aware that nobody is really following them.
4.     Do-nothing Leaders…Leaders who might actually know a lot about their department but choose to avoid getting involved with their employees or the work they do. They often delegate everything to lower-level line managers or supervisors because they think good delegation skills mean they don’t have to do anything. They are busy doing a lot of nothing.
5.      Suck-up Leaders…These ones are so insecure and afraid of their employees that they always appear to be begging their teams to do their jobs. Often they are simply too nice for their own good. They are usually ineffective but if they are fortunate enough to have some sympathetic employees they might actually get a few things done.
6.      Blind Leaders…These folks can see what is going on but are either too dense or too afraid to realize that it might be time for them to act like a leader. They allow bad behavior, poor performance, favouritism and employee conflicts to go on unabated. They often have high turnover rates and cannot understand why nobody wants to work for them.
7.     Insincere Leaders…In order to get ahead,these leaders will say anything to anyone, at anytime, believing that the end justifies the means. They will make promises they cannot keep nor have any intention of keeping, and they will make false compliments to avoid conflict. They delude themselves of their own self-importance but nobody believes anything they say.
8.      Gossiping Leaders…These folks gossip about their organization, their superiors, their employees, their customers, their suppliers and just about anything else that creates good, juicy water cooler talk. They do not understand confidentiality and they pit employee against employee and manager against manager, while avoiding their own responsibilities. Employees don’t trust them and nobody wants to tell them anything because they know it will be repeated.
9.      Defensive Leaders…Leaders who never take responsibility for anything. These people always blame someone else when things go wrong and take all of the glory for themselves when things go right. They are the antithesis of leadership but they think that by deflecting blame, and hoarding success, they are fooling everyone…but nobody is being fooled.
10.     Uncommunicative Leaders…These leaders refuse to tell anyone, anything. They do not feel that employees have the right to know what is going on beyond their specific work-stations or that they have any business knowing about the relative success or failure of their organization. They withhold financial information and refuse to speak to subordinates about the lofty management plans they have or the organizational decisions they might make. Every new thing that happens in the organization comes as a surprise, and usually on short-notice to the workers. Employee dissatisfaction and poor morale reign in their empires.

Everyone on earth who has ever had a job has known a leader with some of the traits indicated here. If you do not want to be a bad leader, the key is to recognize the mistakes you might be making and strive to eliminate and avoid repeating them. If, on the other hand, you are okay with being a bad leader then try out all of the ideas presented here to see which ones create the worst results.

THE 10 A’S OF BAD LEADERSHIP

Often people who operate in one or more of the ten categories of bad leadership will display some of the following behaviours on a regular basis:

1.       Arrogance
2.       Anxiety
3.       Aloofness
4.       Anger
5.       Apathy
6.       Absenteeism
7.       Annoyance
8.      Agitation
9.      Antagonism
10.     Aimlessness

Practice some or all of these for maximum morale-killing effects!

There you have it: Some great ways to be a bad leader! If you utilize as many of these secrets as possible, you too, can join the ranks of the worst leaders on earth.  

Start by showing this article to a trusted colleague or employee and ask him or her if you are guilty of any of these things…Then, get to work making a difference in yourself!

All the Best!

Wayne Kehl

Tragedy and impending danger tend to bring people together in a universal environment of compassion, charity and civility that is often absent when things are good.

When widespread, collective problems or fears abate, most of us return to our usual human pattern of competition, aggression, avoidance, and intolerance of others.  During a hurricane, a war, a flood or an earthquake the love of mankind and our need to aid and nurture each and every person threatened by a common disaster becomes a singular, communal driving force.

Why can people not consistently maintain and exhibit the natural tribal loyalty and altruism that is innate in all of us?

Human beings are essentially pack animals, which helps to explain why we live in cities and work in huge buildings together.  Pack animals know that survival depends on the power that is created when of a number of members of the species live, hunt, share and work together in harmony. Of course our pack-communities are what we know as countries, cities, neighbourhoods and companies, but they represent essentially the same patterns and hierarchies that we can observe in nature.

The wolf-pack is perhaps the most popular non-human example of an effective tribal cooperative.

In the wolf community a leader is selected when he shows superiority over any weaker males who dare to take him on in an all-out fight. In the human community we occasionally have dog-fights to select our leaders, but most often we have a democratic election process where a superior leader is chosen from a slate of qualified candidates.

Whether wolf-pack or human-pack, the hierarchical process is the same: The leader makes decisions for the pack and the followers carry out the work required to maintain the security and integrity of the commune. In both cases, leaders who under-perform can be removed and replaced at almost any time. In case of wolves and humans, replacing a leader usually requires another fight for superiority.

The major difference between wolves and humans is that wolves have almost complete respect and admiration for their leaders while humans often disregard them or resent them to the core.

Getting back to Hurricane Irene; it seems that human beings quite naturally and unavoidably fall back on their primordial instincts when danger threatens the pack. At that point, gone is ego and selfishness; gone is arrogance and superiority; gone is competition and intolerance. In the face of peril, the negative elements of human interaction are quickly replaced by the positive elements of the pack-animal system. Cooperation, collaboration, nurturing and protective instincts flood the minds of the victims, leading them to unusual and amazing acts of courage and kindness.  When danger threatens, people become almost universally good again. They become akin to the wolves that will fight to the death as a group to protect all members of the pack.

When people work together during an impending or actual disaster to protect, save, nurture, and help one another it is a truly wonderful thing to see.

When human beings are not threatened and the usual human vices of egotism, greed, guile, selfishness and rudeness return to the fore, our species takes on an unpleasant air that most of the members of our pack find intolerable. We often hate what we see in the human race, but as the Bible says in John 8:7, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

Ask yourself if you have been guilty of being human lately.

If you answer, “NO”, I think you might need to take stock of the human vices that we have all learned to recognize and acknowledge as unacceptable behaviour in the new millennium.

Most of us make excuses for our vices and sins. We are constantly casting stones at others because they did something to us first.

We believe that a first strike at our integrity, dignity or ego is a perfect reason for us to retaliate in kind, or with even greater force.

All over the world today, fingers are being raised to errant motorists and foul language is being used to upset timid sales clerks. Husbands are yelling at wives and wives are hollering at daughters and sons. Every day, neighbours silently hate neighbours and employees and bosses hate each other collectively. Conversely, in the wolf-packs of the world, there might be a fight for superiority going on somewhere but more often than not if you find a pack of wolves you will find them living, hunting and sharing together in harmony. They know instinctively that they must work together to assure the survival of their community.

Why can’t people be more like wolves?

Let’s not wait for the next disaster before we begin caring for the other human beings on earth again. Let’s start now!

All the Best!

Wayne Kehl

Everyone has different fears.

Various studies tell us that one of the greatest fears known to mankind is the fear of public speaking. In my case, that is not true at all. I do a lot of public speaking and not only am I not frightened by the prospect of it, but I enjoy it to the point that I look forward to it. I did however, have a profound fear of public speaking in my youth. Until now, I had not considered how I overcame my greatest fear because it happened over a period of years and after a number of fumbles and bad starts. It was an evolutionary change brought on by the necessities of my career. The more I did, the more my confidence rose and the less fearful I became.

Usually, the fear itself is not as great a challenge as the ability to overcome it. Facing the idea of battling a fear head-on is much more daunting than actually living quietly with it.

In order to reduce or eliminate a fear, we must understand what is causing it. Fears are warnings of things that have not happened yet. When you are fearful, your mind is setting up a series of mental alarms and emotional defence mechanisms designed to prevent you from doing something. The emotion of fear and the accompanying emotions of anxiety, trepidation, depression or anger are all put into play when the assemblage of your experience, knowledge, memories, nightmares and advice of others come together to focus on the event, thing, person or situation before you. Even though nothing bad has happened yet, the combined body of intelligence that is your psyche’ begins to tell you to avoid a situation that could, conceivably put you in harm’s way. If you allow fear to control you, it will never cease to torment you.

When fear takes hold, it causes us to become weak and helpless.

If the fear is imminent and potentially harmful enough, it might cause us to react with a physical action of some sort. This is commonly known as the fight or flight response. When our brain tells us that fight or flight is necessary, our reactions can vary from a full-on attack on the person or thing that we fear, or a simple turn-and-run-away response. In both cases, our intention is to save ourselves from potential harm. If we attack, we might destroy the object of our fears or drive it off…thereby neutralizing it. If we run away we will leave it behind…at least temporarily.

Living with fear or living a life of fight or flight is not an acceptable way to get through our short time on earth and accordingly, it is best to move beyond our fears. However, we cannot push past a fear until we understand what causes it. In the case of the fear of public speaking, I learned over time, that the basis for my early fear was that I had a desperate need to avoid failure. I had an unspoken belief that if what I had to say was inadequate for the audience, or if I stammered, stuttered or forgot my lines, I would be made to look foolish in front of my peers and superiors. In the worst case scenario I might be jeered, insulted and chased off the stage.  I was afraid not only of the actual speaking, but of the ridicule, embarrassment, dishonour and distress it might cause me.

The next time you are faced with a fear, ask yourself these questions:

• What am I afraid of?
• Why are other people I know not afraid of this?
• What is the worst thing that could happen?
• Will challenging this fear end my life?
• Will this situation cause me any physical harm?
• What precautions can I take to avoid failure?
• Will the embarrassment, dishonour or distress of failing damage my career or my relationships with those most important to me?
• Will others forgive me if I fail?
• Can I forgive myself if I fail?
• Is it worth the effort to overcome this fear?
• Most fears cannot be overcome immediately.

Because real fears are lodged firmly in the instinctive part of your brain, the Amygdala, your fight or flight response will continue until the cognitive part of your brain, the Neo-cortex rationalizes the fact that there is no imminent harm presented by the object of your fears. With strong desire and real effort, you can convince your brain, in time to accept the negative potential events you fear and eliminate its effects on you.

If you never give up trying to overcome your fear and face it often you will eventually succeed. Practice speaking in front of a mirror, in front of friends, and in front of small groups. When you see the smiles on the faces of your friendly audience your confidence will soar. When your listeners nod knowingly and applaud when you are done, you will be a public speaker and you will no longer have to live with fear.

Five steps to public speaking success:

• The only way to overcome fear is to put your toe in the water and test the temperature often. Speak every chance you get.
• Have friends or loved ones come with you for emotional support while you try it out.
• While you are trying it out, convince yourself that failure is an option and that once you have gotten all of the missteps and fumbles out of the way, you will improve.
• Always maintain a belief that you can succeed.
• Practice, practice, practice!

Most people can be much better speakers than they actually think they can. Push your fear out the door and give yourself a chance to be great!

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

Throughout my career in leadership I had to accept this one major truth: I will not always make decisions that will make me universally popular. 

When leading, we must always put our followers first; we must always do our best for our team members and we must always be servant leaders. However, in the course of business, as leaders we will occasionally find ourselves in a position where in order to do the best for the team we must make hard decisions that are not easily understood or agreed to by them. 

In order to lead, you must have the trust of the team. However, you must also do everything you can to maintain the profitability of your organization. If you are in a leadership position and never find yourself making unpopular decisions, you are probably not doing a very good job. 

Always communicate the reasons for your difficult decisions to your team. Through open, honest, timely communication you will gain their undying trust. 

A leader who is indecisive, inconsistent, misleading, or a pushover will be much less popular than one who is open, honest, decisive, and courageous. Team members need strong leaders; leaders they can trust to fight for them. Are you that leader? 

I am Wayne Kehl from Dynamic Leadership

Despite the multiplicity of interpretations we read every day, leadership can be defined simply as:

“Organizing a group of people to achieve a common goal”

A leader can be anyone. There is no need for any formal authority to lead. A person simply needs to have the will, the courage, the charisma and the ability to capture the imagination of one or more followers in order to be considered a leader.

Centuries ago, it was assumed that good and powerful leaders had naturally occurring leadership traits that set them apart from others…Hence, the term, “leaders are born not made”.  However, more recent studies have made it clear that given the right set of circumstances and with the appropriate motivation, most people can become true and effective leaders.

Some of the naturally occurring traits that make leadership ability come more easily to certain people are:

•           Intelligence
•          Assertiveness
•          Diligence
•          Openness
•          Courage

 When those instinctive traits are combined with learned skills and natural talents, variable levels of leadership ability may be reached. Without all of those traits, effective leadership is possible but much more difficult to achieve.

“It is important to note that one can lead much more effectively when the leadership endeavour involves something that the leader has good expertise in so that he or she may set an example”

It must also be something in which the followers have a need for or an interest in being lead in. For example: An expert tennis player might make a great tennis coach but a lousy sales manager. In addition, there would be no point in trying to lead someone to better customer service skills when he or she works in the depths of a coal mine.

 As trite as those examples might seem, it is not unusual that people are put into leadership positions that they are not capable of handling simply because they have done well in another unrelated area. Also, self-promoting or toxic people who have no business trying to lead will often attempt to influence or lead coworkers in inappropriate directions. Both situations will create poor results.

“Good and powerful leaders need to have self-awareness and a solid grip on their own emotions”

 Leadership skill necessarily includes the ability to set a mood or tone for the team. Leaders unavoidably telegraph their moods and attitudes to their followers who will adopt the preeminent emotional tone of the leader and carry it throughout the organization.

“One must not assume the only way to achieve financial success or even team success is through servant leadership, participative leadership, or compassionate leadership”

Given the right impetus and favourable circumstances an autocratic, command and control leader can drive his team to success both in the business world, on a sports court or on a battlefield. In the twenty-first century, we tend to reject that style of leadership, but it can be an effective (albeit, potentially negative and harmful) form of leadership nonetheless. If the team is not engaged and motivated, a strong autocrat might be the only leader who can create the environment needed for success.

Modern leadership lecturers and writers also reject the term “management”, since it seems to imply a lack of compassion and favours transactional or task orientation as opposed to transformational or people-oriented leadership. In reality, all organizations have some form of tasks and a specific number of people so it is evident that management may still be an integral part of the leadership cycle in many cases.

 “In essence, even Bad Leadership is a form of leadership”

The efficacy of any leadership style can only be measured in results. In other words if the team meets or exceeds all of its goals, under the direction of its leader, those who benefit from those results may assume that the leadership was good regardless of the leader’s style. However, it is important to note that bad leadership in any form is usually short-lived.

The best and generally, most effective form of leadership occurs when a leader is able to maintain a high level of concern for his or her people while simultaneously keeping high-level performance paramount in the minds of all participants. This form of leadership often goes a step beyond servant leadership because it allows the leader to accurately control production and monitor results for maximum success. A leader who can juggle tasks and people without sacrificing integrity for either is a great leader indeed. That leader will almost always turn out better performance, more production and measurable growth while presiding over happy, well-engaged employees.

“It is important to recognize that groups of working people are assembled primarily to create some sort of product or service”

Great leaders are able to create buy-in to the vision of the organization while accepting and embracing the direction of its leaders. The key to buy in and strong followership is communication.

Great Leaders are Great Communicators!

Ten ways to recognize a great leader:

•      Great leaders create a sense of unity amongst all team members.
•      Great leaders have strong interpersonal skills and they encourage interpersonal     communication amongst team members.
•      Great leaders have the ability to create a unanimous desire amongst team members to achieve common goals.
•      Great leaders communicate their vision to their team enthusiastically.
•      Great leaders constantly seek feedback from team members.
•      Great leaders never stop learning new leadership techniques.
•      Great leaders set fair and reasonable performance standards and assist team members in achieving them.
•      Great leaders set a conscientious, diligent example for the team.
•      Great leaders never settle for mediocrity from themselves or from their team.
•     Great leaders give credit for great results to the team.

 What is leadership?

“Leadership is the embodiment of the positive dynamics evident in all great human relationships within one person or leadership team!”

All the Best

Wayne Kehl

http://motivationalkehl.blogspot.com/2011/08/are-you-living-authentic-life.html

There is nothing sadder than the death of someone who has never lived!

Here is a quote from the late rocker, Jimi Hendrix: “I’m the one who’s got to die when it’s time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.”

This quote speaks to me of the human need to go along or succumb to the pressures of the groups we find ourselves being members of. In life, we tend to do what our leaders tell us to do whether or not we agree and whether or not they may be contrary to our own desires. We wear fashionable clothing that we don’t like, we work at jobs we do not enjoy, we are polite when we would rather be outspoken, and we often do whatever we are told without thought.

As Jimi said, we must accept that our leaders, mentors and critics will not be there to tell us how to live our deaths even though they constantly told us how to live our lives.

I admire people who are authentic and true to themselves; the people who do what THEY want to do despite criticism from others. As long as their actions and thoughts are positive they harm no one.

For me, success is the happiness and satisfaction that comes from doing the things that we truly want to do. After all, there is nothing sadder than the death of a person who has never lived!

Sadly, I am beginning to think that a lot of prosperous people are the worst liars on earth and that heaven must be crowded with some of the most philanthropic cheaters ever born. Happily, we are all aware of completely scrupulous people who prosper and reach great financial heights while exercising pure honesty. However, despite the teachings of our parents, dishonesty is still a large factor in business today.

“Do cheaters and liars prosper?…Of course they do! Do they live happy lives?…Of course not!

FIVE TYPES OF LIARS

There are basically five types of liars in the business world:

1.        Compulsive liars …People who are so psychologically insecure that they believe lying is necessary for survival. They will pile one lie on top of the next and sometimes begin to believe them.
2.     Blatantly dishonest, remorseless liars … Those who cannot differentiate between right and wrong and believe that lying is a great way to get what they want.  They are usually extremely greedy and some of them have actual criminal intent.
3.       Strategic liars …People who stretch the truth, make up false stories or withhold the whole truth in order to win or make a point. These folks are often the best negotiators and deal makers in large, successful businesses.
4.        White liars…They are the ones who believe that a small white lie now and again is not really a lie at all. These people often justify a lie because they believe it helped someone or at the very least did not harm anyone.
5.       Situational liars…These are the lesser liars who do not make a habit of lying but will twist and turn the truth in order to avoid an unpleasant or difficult situation. They might cheat on their taxes or fake an illness to avoid work.

DISHONESTY IS ALL AROUND US

You can find people from all five types at all levels of business. The most common form of dishonesty at the management or executive level is the Strategic type. North American business standards require that corporations succeed and grow. In order to grow, businesses must compete with others in their field and often the best way to show superiority to potential customers is to tell lies about their products and services. It is also a common way to lure new employees into the fold or convince others not to leave.

Business leaders who convince customers and employees of falsehoods in order to grow and succeed are often rewarded with huge paycheques and amazing bonuses. In some cases they are pushed into a web of lies in order to keep their jobs or get the next promotion. Success is the primary goal and anything short of outright criminal activity is justifiable as long as profitability is maintained. Occasionally the dishonesty crosses the line and alas, criminal activity ensues. The twentieth and twenty-first centuries are replete with successful executives-turned lawbreakers.

Some high level leaders think nothing of lying to employees and customers. They wear their dishonesty like a crown and pride themselves on their ability to negotiate favourable deals at the seemingly minor expense of truth.

“They justify their larceny by convincing themselves and those around them that the business world is a kill or be killed environment where only the strong shall survive and a win by any means is a good win!

DISHONESTY IS HARD TO LIVE WITH

Despite their financial success, most dishonest leaders are never truly happy. They are often cynical, distrustful and fearful that someone might lie to them or catch them in one of their own lies. Many often show signs of extreme fatigue and others seemed distant or agitated at the most inappropriate times. They have difficulty being present and they will occasionally lapse into inexplicable disengagement or anger.

No matter how much money they make, they can never relax and enjoy it.  They live in a jungle of mistruths, misfeasance and larceny that no normal human psyche can withstand for an extended period of time. Often, the thirst for success is so powerful that even the money they want so badly will not soothe their troubled souls.

“It is true what they say: “Money does not bring happiness!”

HONESTY BRINGS PEACE OF MIND!

When you live of life of pure honesty you have far less to worry about! It is almost impossible to regret being honest and telling the truth virtually never brings any personal guilt. Honesty produces wonderful reputations and creates friends wherever it goes. Most people want to associate with an honest person and everyone will come to the aid of someone who consistently tells them the truth. Honest people smile a lot and find the positive elements in everything they do. Often the positive attention they garner will bring opportunities for financial success that dishonest folks will never be offered. They are the good people of the world and others enjoy watching them succeed.

“The trust that honesty brings can catapult good people to fabulous wealth!

WHAT IS THE VALUE OF HONESTY?

Honesty, like success cannot be measured in money.  Honest people may or may not achieve the financial success of their less-honest brethren, but regardless of their bank balances, their lives will be more fulfilled and they will be truly honoured and celebrated after death. They are the real leaders of mankind… the ones we all look up to and the ones we all want to emulate.

“What is the value of honesty?…………….It is Priceless!

All the Best!

Wayne Kehl

http://motivationalkehl.blogspot.com/2011/07/stop-being-selfish-find-happiness-and.html

If you want to get along with more people start thinking about someone other than yourself. If you have problems with relationships it is probably largely to do with your own actions and the fact that you are thinking more about yourself than the people you don’t get along with.

I once applied for a job as a sales manager with a large, international insurance firm. Part of the application process was a multiple-choice exam to determine the mindsets of the various candidates. I can only recall one question on the exam: “What is the most important characteristic of a great sales manager?” There were ten possible answers and I had to rank them from one to ten in order of importance. The number one answer was this: “The desire to see others do well.”

Frankly, I did not expect it to top the list but I have never forgotten that one question and its wonderful answer. Just think about a world where everyone has a constant, daily desire to see others do well. I now know that if I put others before myself, I will quite unavoidably bring positive energy to everything I do.

Stop being selfish and put an end to negativity, stress, and sadness in your life.

I am Wayne Kehl from Dynamic Leadership